Habits

 

For exactly 17 months I had no internet in my home. At first I was livid, astonished! Then I learned to actually enjoy it. I even had thoughts of never getting internet even when it became available. Ha! 

We have had internet for a few months now. It has sucked me right in with all it's charm and interesting sites.

I have a love/hate relationship with it. Maybe you can relate.

You see, I desire to be a woman who is a life long learner. I want to read the great books! I want to draw! Paint! Read poetry! Know things! UNDERSTAND things!

I have lost some of that vision. I remember a few years ago envisioning who I was going to be down the road. A strong, learned, grace filled woman. A woman who speaks softly. (If you're going to dream, go big!)  I want to have the strength to be that woman. I want to create habits in my life that help me become her and not have habits that distract and lead me in other directions.

I have been going to bed frustrated lately because I know I didn't use my time wisely. I got distracted. I was lazy. Justified my ways.

When I wake I pray for a good day. A day of greatness. A day filled with more of Jesus and less of me. More truth, goodness and beauty. Less of the meaningless, unimportant and quite honestly, ugly.

Today has been wonderful. I created beauty out of chaos by decorating for a women's brunch. I came home to light a candle, brew some coffee, and read. I have thought good thoughts. Repented of the bad.

I have vision again. I pray for the strength, balance and grace that will be needed to succeed. To be the woman I want to be. I pray for good habits. To say no to what I know will not produce life. To say yes, I can do hard things.

     "Every habit has its beginning. The beginning is the idea 

which comes with a stir and

 takes possession of us. "

Charlotte Mason

I am "stirred" to take hold of my choices and start making better habits. 

Lord, help me.